The Most Amazing Month

Trying to sum up how the last month of my life has impacted me leaves my head spinning. All of the things I have learned, all the ways I have grown, and all the people met have had their own effect. I will carry the experiences we had, and the memories we made with me. It is hard to put into words what rhetoricians would call "intensity of feeling", the burst of emotions I have when thinking about our trip that stubbornly resists comprehension. 

I can say with confidence is that from lift off to touch down, these have been some of the most amazing weeks of my life so far. 

I was lucky enough to start with a sturdy foundation of some of the most incredible people I have ever met. Ms. Sciacca, Hawi, Anna, and Ana, have taught me so much about being strong, genuine, and kind, and I could not ask for a better group of women to be with throughout our trip. We learned how to move as a cohesive unit early on, and with Ms. Sciacca only a phone call away, the rest of us spent every meal together, as Anna reminded us, a time for family. Being part of the ILC meant having people that I could trust and rely on while encountering an environment so different from home, and so many miles away from it. 

Sharing a meal with new friends and old

While in Nashville, and later in Philly, I had my first genuine experiences with college tours, a very different feeling from wandering around the UC Berkeley Campus. In the process, I learned a lot about myself and what I value in receiving higher education. It is easy to have vague goals, you want to go to "good school", or maybe you know you want to go to school in a certain climate, but until you take some tours it is hard to actually know what you really want in a school. 

I learned from both of the tours that I really value an emphasis on community, and subsequently a smaller student body, this was not something that I had expected, but as soon as I walked out of the Vanderbilt tour it was ringing loud in my head. Conversely, when we toured UPenn, as impressed as I was by the academics, somewhere in my gut it felt just a bit too impersonal. Of course, some of this could change, and just a 3-hour tour can't tell you everything, but having that kind of foundation is something that I am extremely grateful for. 

Before the Vandy tour!

Besides hearing how different schools present themselves having the opportunity to actually live in a college dorm, and all that came with that was definitely an invaluable experience. From learning to use communal showers and bathrooms (very different from sharing with siblings), to just living in a place surrounded not by family, but peers, friends, and strangers, all there for a similar purpose. It was such a different environment than anything I had ever been in before, and I learned that living outside of California, while at times uncomfortable, was actually really fascinating and reaffirmed my commitment to moving far away for college. 

Over the course of our time in Nashville, Vanderbilt went from a school that I knew very little about, to being at the top of my list. 

When thinking back on our trip, it is impossible to ignore what served as the center of my VSA universe, my proctor group. We all came into the group total strangers, from all over the world with differing life experiences and vastly different backgrounds, but during those three short weeks we laughed, cried,  exchanged endless friendship bracelets, danced, worked as a team, and above all became a potato family. They showed me how compassionate, accepting, and supportive of each others' dreams a group forged by chance and with only a short time together could be. Proctor Group Meetings at the end of the day became something that I looked forward to, all of us gathered in Payton's dimly lit room sharing about our days and often staying long after it ended to just talk and laugh, half delirious but enjoying each others company none the less.  

The only photo with all of us, you can see some of our personality shining through

I miss all the girls that made out group so special, and of course our fearless leader Payton. Payton, as our Proctor, set the tone for the whole group, and I am certain that VSA would not have been the magical experience it was for me without her. She made becoming as close as we did easy with her contagious humor and smile that could light up a whole city. 

As it goes in life not all my interactions at VSA were roses and sunshine, there were moments that reminded me just how much of a bubble we live in, and ones where it became very apparent that most of the people around us led lives of privilege that allowed them to attend the pricey program. We had conversations with people that had become our friends where both sides disagreed about core issues, but through patience and empathy, they were often able to be productive, or at least not turn toxic. In my class, I was thrust into the position of defending values that are often just accepted as common back in the Bay, and ended learning a lot about myself and the power of my own voice. That is not to say that there were not times when it felt as if we were surrounded by intolerance, and comparatively powerless, but in those moments I still saw the strength of my fellow ILCers to stand their ground. 

In class, my mind was stretched in yet another way, taught by a Vanderbilt professor in a room full of students who wanted to be there, who had in fact written an essay to be in that very place.  Needless to say, it was very different than any classroom I had ever been in before. We had tough discussions about the complex political and social structures constantly surrounding us, and how as students of rhetoric we could strive to complicate and question the world. We learned about the implications of words and texts on society and the ways that they implore us to think and act. All of us emerged with new rhetorical tools to be better speakers, listeners, and interpreters.

Since returning home I have made it a point to tell everyone I talk to about the amazing experience I had while across the country, my friends and family must be tired of hearing me tell them about all that we did and saw. I know one thing for sure, our trip is the gift that keeps giving, I won't stop sharing with everyone I meet about all I learned, the people I met, and broadened horizons I now see.

Looking out on new horizons